I often wonder why God felt it was so important for us to forgive people who we feel have wronged us. In His Word, Christ Himself said-
Forgive your brother seventy times seven… in one day.
My flesh thinks that this is utter madness. But my spirit has grown to know that the longer you hold on to the wrong or wrongs that someone has done to you, the more you intoxicate yourself.
Have you ever noticed that when someone has hurt or offended you, you mull over the offense for hours…Sometimes this turns into days, and then days might turn into weeks and months and years. The silly thing is the longer we mull over the offense, we create a movie in our heads that is actually far from the truth. And the sad part is, we believe it.
It’s like watching Batman. Have you ever watched Batman so many times, that you think you’re Batman or the villain in the movie? In your head, the character and the words that they say become real. ( I have by the way. I thought I was Catwoman).
I think we do the same with our offences. We plug them into our Little brain DVD/Bluray player and we replay it over and over… Until we seemingly have memorized each aspect of the conflict by heart. But the unfortunate thing with going over offenses in real time, is that all you have to rewind the conversation is your memory, which is quite fallible at replaying events in its complete accuracy. In fact, I think each time we replay an offence in our head, we add on pieces or take away pieces to make our story justify our anger a little more. But this is exactly what the enemy depends on. And he will use it to make sure we become bitter as possible and unforgiving to our brethren.
Unforgiveness is a powerful toxin. It dictates your life if you don’t address it. It can lead to bitterness if you don’t deal with it.
Bitterness will defile if you ever get to that point.
I’ve recently had to deal with a situation that could have led me straight into a path of unforgiveness and then bitterness. While I had every opportunity to be hurt and go over what the other person had done, I decided to just let it go and trust God to heal my heart. Notice what I said… “Heal MY Heart.” Not ‘fix the other person’. Not “make them realize what they did wrong”. Just heal my heart. You know what? I feel so much better. I have no malice in my heart. I have no bitterness towards anyone. And while I know there might be residual hurt there… I am trusting God to heal ME from that, rather than point fingers at others for their shortcomings and how they offended me.
I really believe that unforgiveness in one season of your life, if brought over to other seasons, can dictate the outcomes of those other seasons. I don’t want that for myself. In fact, however God chooses to move forward in my life, I don’t want to have to look back on my past experiences and be fearful and angry at others He will place in my future. I think this is why God is so big on forgiveness. Unforgiveness binds you. It’s can be a long lasting hemorrhoid if you let it. And so Christ urges us to let the offence/s go. Don’t let them stay. Don’t mull them over. Let them go. Let mercy reign in your heart for people who you think have hurt you.
Have you had an experience where you held on to a wrong someone or some people did to you? Have you released them? Or are you still mulling over what they did to you? I can tell you right now… that will get you nowhere. RELEASE them. It doesn’t matter if you think they were wrong and you were right. Everyone has a perspective which makes pronouncing judgment very complicated. When you’re hurt and offended (especially when you’ve been offended in the same area more than once), your perspective is thwarted to satisfy your own defence. To vindicate you even. So your best bet, is to let it go. And trust God to bring healing to your OWN life.