Give us this day, our daily bread

Tag Archives: Brokenheart

Old things are passed away. Behold all things become new- 11Cor 5:17

I had a fantastic weekend! I cannot possibly tell you all of the amazing things that God has done for me over the last three days! But in sum, last weekend was the Encounter weekend at my local church. An encounter weekend is an opportunity to have what I call a “run-in” with God. When you encounter God your life is truly changed. I mean…really! You would not want to go back to the old you. This was my first Encounter experience at the church. I went because there were some areas in my life that I needed God to address and I desperately needed to see Him move in my life. …When I got there, God had other plans. As I said, I cannot tell you all of the things that God has done for me on this encounter. And truly, the Encounter weekends that we have at my church, are experienced differently by everyone who comes; it is no doubt that people come from across Canada and the US to be a part of this experience.
But I feel led to tell you about one of the miracles that God has given to me this weekend.
See, I am not this big strong macho woman that I am always perceived to be (No way!! Really?). Like many of you I have a past. My past was painful. Really painful. And many times, no matter how much I purpose to let it go, I remember things. Or at least my memory is triggered by things that send me into a stupor. It could be something as simple as passing by the almond chocolate bin in bulk barn, or driving by a lake,…looking at a photo. Simple things. But they would really get me down at times.  Other times, it would be trying to develop new relationships, but remembering that almost every relationship I’ve had (friendship or intimate) has ended for little or no reason. I became indifferent to people. I’d meet them, do stuff with them, but deep in my heart, I didn’t care to hold on to them. I purposed in my heart, that I wouldn’t. No one ever stayed around long enough, so why bother opening my heart.

What I had was a closed heart. And over the weekend, God revealed this to me. It wasn’t just closed. It was stoned. There were cracks all over it. No one could see them, because I wore a smile as best as I could. More than that, I stopped talking to people-family, friends, everybody about what was going on in my life. They never seem to understand anyway. My heart was broken, more than once, more than twice, more than 10 times in the lifespan of a 29 year old. It had become worn, calloused and cold. It had been that way for a while….and I was a Christian.

It was on the encounter weekend that I felt my Surgeon come up to me. See I had totally forgotten the power of the cross and what Christ endured to qualify as my Physician. I laid myself at the symbolic cross that was in the room and as I poured out whatever little drop of blood was left from my stone cold heart, He came up to me and said “I’m going to give you a heart transplant this weekend”. It was a rare and precious moment, because I literally saw with my spiritual eyes someone dressed in a white robe with stethoscope telling me this. Once I received that word, I got up. But that was my first encounter that weekend.

The next day was a 15 hour day of what I would call “intense unscrewing of nuts and bolts”; all the ministers shared on different things that can mess someone up. And every time a message was shared, it was as if my Surgeon would tap me on my shoulder and tell me the exact experience that contributed to the state of my heart. Mind you, no one was given any prophetic words or anything. They were just sharing. But God was always speaking to everyone there at different times about their own lives.

That afternoon, we had a deliverance service. I’m thinking “I’ve done this before. No biggy”. I was clearly wrong. I can’t share everything that God did for me that night. But what He did do was show up and delivered me from a broken heart.

“S, what do you mean? How do you get delivered from a broken heart?”

During my deliverance, my Surgeon said, I am giving you a new heart NOW. In a split second, I felt a sharp cool pain in my chest. It was like putting on an ice gel. I felt melting, and within a split second, I felt a new heartbeat. NB: I am so not talking about my human heart! I am talking about the heart that you can’t see that makes you ‘feel’ the way you do. I saw (in the spirit what had happened. My surgeon took out the heart that was jacked up in the past and He gave me a new heart. When done, He said “it’s finished”.

The next day (Sunday), my Pastor told us that we’d all take a stone and let it serve as a memorial to us of the encounter. I casually took a stone.  Then the Holy Spirit said to me “look at your stone.” I did. The stone I picked was in the basic shape of an organ heart, with a septum and all. Even the back had the impressions of a real organ heart. He said “this is what I took out of you. A stoned heart. Let it be a reminder to you, that I am the God of heart transplants and I have given you a new heart”. Here’s the stone I picked. (Won’t share what the real heart looks like. You’d be grossed out. So if interested, you can google it:

Why am I sharing my story with you? As I said, I live in a human form just like all of you. And I will not pretend as if I am perfect. The truth is, had it not been for the grace of God, I wouldn’t have lasted so long. The whole story is yet to be told, but bottom line, my heart was in such a state from past experiences, that God decided that there was no point mending it. So He gave me a new one.

But for those of you who have been/are where I was-those of you who carry a smile around, yet on the inside there is turmoil in your heart. Those of you who have pasts that haunt you everyday, and you don’t know how to move on from it and you wonder if things will ever be normal on the inside. Those of you who go through every day, mundane, and bland, just hoping for something to change, but at the same time, you don’t want to get your hopes up because you’ll be disappointed and then that’ll just break your heart even more… YOUR GOD IS THE GOD OF HEART TRANSPLANTS. Many times we hear that God will ‘fix’ it, He will mend a broken heart. God’s healing is perfect. He doesn’t just ‘mend’. He’s not a ‘patchwork’ God. He is more than able to give you a new heart. Lay your old heart at the altar, and cry out to Him. He will renew you.

So I got up this morning with my new heart and all. And for the first time in forever, I woke up laughing. New day. New heart. New life.

PS: If any one wants to come to the next Encounter, I will talk about it close to time. The next one is in September I think. $80 and they feed you like it’s no one’s business! I think I’ll do a give away! But if you want God to do something grand in your life, think about coming out.



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